Good morning all, and welcome back. I promised you yesterday that Today's journey back in time would be "interesting," and so it shall be. So, sit down, buckle up, and hold on as we make our trip back in time to
MONDAY, 17 JUNE 2019
The plan for the day was to tour the National History Museum, EAT LUNCH (this is important, remember the order in which we do things today), then take a tour of the Capital Building, and end our day early so we could go back to camp and spend some time playing down at the little beach by the river.
The Natural History Museum was just like any ordinary, run of the mill museum, only 1000 times larger. The kids all took off in their own directions, leaving Nathan and I to wander at our own pace. One of the things I have enjoyed the most about doing these blog posts about our vacation is seeing the things the kids thought were interesting enough to take a picture of. I have got a good kick out of it. And so it is, I bring you the next episode of "What did the kids take pictures of now?"
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Shenanigan's in the elevator |
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AAAAAHHHHHH!!!! |
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I don't ask questions. |
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I wonder if they come alive at night like they do in "Night at the Museum." |
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I am so glad we don't have mosquitos that big!! |
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That is a big fish |
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I'm betting that Lion Heart took this picture. |
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Naturally, one must take pictures of mummies. |
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And pictures of little mummies |
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And we can't forget the mummies animals either. |
By the time we finished our shenanigans in the museum, it was time for some lunch before we made our way up to the capital building. We really didn't have a lot of time to go looking for a restaurant, but we noticed that there were some food trucks right outside of the museum. They looked pretty decent and were relatively a decent price. Out of all of the food truck options, the hotdog food truck had the best prices and looked pretty good. Now, ordinarily I am not a big fan of hotdogs, unless they are a corndog or a chilidog. It was my lucky day, they had chilidogs, and let me tell you, they were DELICIOUS!! Some of the best chilidogs I have ever eaten. I had a couple of chilidogs and was feeling quite satisfied......oh how little did I know I was about to pay the price for that little indulgence. But we'll come to that.
We had some afternoon, lunchtime shenanigans outside of the museum.
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Just to forewarn you, you will be seeing more of this kid and his selfies with statues. Oh, my, that's so what I need to call them. Selfies with Statues. |
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These kids just crack me up. |
There are two ways you can go about getting a tour of the Capital Building.
1. Show up to the Capital Building, and get into one of the huge lines to get your name on a waiting list for a tour and then wait in ANOTHER huge line to wait to be put into a large tour group.
2. If you plan your trip well enough in advance, a couple of months before your trip, give your Congressman's office a call and schedule a private tour through them. This is the option we took. A couple of months before our trip, we called the office of our Congressman, Christ Stewart and scheduled a tour through his office. He wasn't there when we visited, which is too bad because I really would have liked to meet him. I am a HUGE fan of his Great and Terrible book series he wrote.
Anyway, We drove from the museum up to the Capital Building (it was way too much of a distance to walk). Finding a place to park was an adventure, but we got it all sorted out and figured that we'd just go into the Capital Building and find out where we were supposed to go.
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Capital Building Visitor's entrance. It's always best to enter the Capital Building legally and when you are invited to. |
You only go to the Capital Building visitor entrance if you are going to to one of the generic, run-of-the-mill tours. If you scheduled a tour through your Congressman's office, you have to go to the Congressman's office. So, that meant we had to go on a quest to get to Chris Stewart's offices.
After some wandering around, we were able to locate where we were supposed to be and began our tour. One of Chris Stewart's aides took us on a very lovely tour. We got to walk down all of the underground halls and passageways. It was really cool. I would highly recommend doing your tour through your Congressman's office. You get a longer, more personalized, and in depth tour.
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Family photo op. Hey, with the exception of Meow-meow, we are all looking pretty good here...... |
We have reached the point in our journey where things............... um, shall we say............... start "brewing." So, I'm sure you all know the bean song, right?
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And then Lion Heart has to do bunny ears! I don't think Nathan had any idea. 😂😂😂😂 |
"Beans, beans, the magical fruit!
The more you eat, the more you toot!
The more you toot, the better you feel!
Beans, beans for every meal!!"
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I love that Jaina and Meow-meow are dancing down in the corner. |
WORD TO THE WISE:: DON'T EAT STREET VENDOR CHILI DOGS IF YOU WANT TO KEEP YOUR DIGNITY INTACT!!
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They have statues from all 50 states. This is the one from Hawaii. |
From here out, I will give you fair warning, things aren't going to be couth or dignified. If you enjoy hilarious and embarrassing fart story, this will be right up your alley.
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I am going to guess that Lion Heart took this picture. I'm sure he found it quite hilarious. And if you know Lion Heart, you'll know why he found it funny. |
Well, the beans started to do their magical job. I'm just not one of those people who can hold them in, I just don't have that kind of sphincter control, and not because I haven't tried to. I really and truly have tried through the years to hold them in, I just can't!! Besides, I once heard that if you try to hold them in, they travel up your spine and that's where crappy ideas come from. But that's neither here nor there.
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Our tour guide said that this is a favorite spot where people like to get pictures of the dome. So, "when in Rome....." |
I feel so bad for our poor tour guide and have to give her kuddos for soldiering on despite the shenanigans. You have heard of the term, "Silent but Deadly?" Yeah, these put that saying to shame. I have never, in the then 46 years of my life, ever had flatulence that bad, nor have I ever since this incident. I am blaming it ALL on the street vendor chili dogs.
These weren't your normal and ordinary toots!! These were the kind that linger, flow, follow, disperse, and spread. The smell was the kind that made your eyes water and burn and make your nose hairs shrivel up and die. The kind that you can taste. Farts smell bad, but these went above and beyond that. If the FBI ever needed to get information out of someone, all they would need to do is feed me those chili dogs and put me in a room with whoever it is they want information from. By the time I'm done with them, they'll be crying for mommy and will spill whatever beans (see what I did there?) the FBI wants out of them!! We joked afterwards that I had committed a "Capital Offense." But in light of what recently happened at the Capital Building, it's been suggested to me that it wouldn't be a good idea to mention that. So, forget I even said it.
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There's a lot of really cool stuff to see and a lot of really cool history to look at. |
For a while there, I had been worried that security would get involved, thinking that there had been some kind of chemical attack, send in the SWAT teams, shut the building down, and detain everyone. Literally I was worried about that!! That's how bad my gas was on this particular afternoon!! Ya'll think I'm joking, but I'm not.......MY FLATULENCE WAS CHEMICAL WARFARE BAD!! Again, I blame it all on the chili dogs.
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Those are Kitten-katten paw prints.. Forever memorialized on the floor of our Nation's Capital. They've been there for hundreds of years. Cat graffiti!! |
If that wasn't bad enough.....yes, it gets worse or more hilarious, depending on who you are..... It was really, REALLY busy and crowded that day. Oh, so many, many, many poor and unsuspecting people got crop dusted that day. I have often wondered if anyone there that day still talks about the horrible smell in the Capital that day.
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I may or may not have "purposely" let one fly here. I plead the 5th. |
And if THAT wasn't bad enough...... There was a group of people, who I swear were Russian military dignitaries there taking a tour, and they were pretty much behind us the whole time. I was afraid that I might accidentally start an international incident.
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The group the arrow is pointing to? Yeah, that's the Russian people I was talking about. |
And if THAT wasn't bad enough, the kids all knew who was making the smell. They knew what the source of the stench was. And THEY, being kids......and we all know that kids find that kind of thing hilarious....... kept LOUDLY saying, "MOM!! WAS THAT YOU?!?!?!?" "OH MY GOODNESS, MOM, THAT IS HORRIBLE!! WHAT DID YOU EAT?!?!?" Poor Nathan kept trying to shush them. And yet, our tour guide soldiered on. She was my hero that day for putting up with us. She totally deserves a raise.
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Where's Waldo? No, that's not it. Where's Jacen and Lion Heart? Yeah, that's it, can you spot Jacen and Lion Heart? |
And if THAT wasn't bad enough, the kids all started laughing hysterically about it. And every time one of those little devils would escape out of me, they would loudly call me out on it, over exaggeratedly gag, and then start laughing their heads off. Now mind you, my toots went on during the ENTIRE tour of the Capital.
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Alright, how about this one? Can you find Lion Heart, Tiger Lily, and Firecracker? |
And if THAT wasn't bad enough.......can it really get any worse? Yes, yes it can. I was so embarrassed (and admittedly found it highly amusing) that I couldn't stop laughing. Every time I let one rip, the kids would do their thing, Nathan would do his thing, and I would laugh so hard I couldn't breathe. I'm sure it was NO secret to anyone there who was the culprit!! At one point I was laughing so hard I couldn't even walk, I mean LITERALLY couldn't walk!! Couldn't walk, couldn't breathe, tears streaming down my face, and my entire face, ears, and neck were red as a fire engine!!
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I don't know why, but the pose on this statue cracks me up. |
Do you want to know what happened as soon as we finished our tour and left the Capital Building? My farts stopped. Yup!! Stopped, done, finished, gone, ended!! And that is the story of how I gassed the Capital Building.
***** NATHAN SPEAKING HERE*****
OKAY, OKAY, that's enough!! Can we have some dignity now?!?!
Yes, yes we can.
The Capital building was beautiful. I shall let the pictures speak for themselves.
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There is literally busts, statues, and wall sculptures everywhere!! |
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Beautiful chandeliers and the art on the ceilings was amazing. |
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I love fancy chandeliers |
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I think this is the center point of something, I don't remember what though. |
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Lots of fascinating displays. |
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It was all just awe inspiring to look at. |
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Well, alrighty then. |
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More statues |
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statues and chandeliers. Straight ahead is the statue of Brigham Young. |
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I somehow recall our tour guide saying something about a secret chamber under this, but I could be wrong. I didn't hear much of what she said because of......... well we need to be dignified now. *ahem* I didn't catch much of the conversations because I don't walk as quickly as I used to and quite frequently get left in the dust, and not because I am being an embarrassment to the establishment. |
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The Capital Building has a gift shop. In said gift shop, you can purchase this Bill. I remember those commercials. |
And, as promised, I give you......
SELFIES WITH STATUES!!
I warned you, he took a lot of selfies with statues..........
There were other selfie shenanigans involved as well.......
He's not the only one who got in on the selfie shenanigans.....
We move from selfies with statues to posing with statues.
Well, that was fun!! Let us go and consult with what I wrote on my journal page.
Today's date is: 17 June 2019
Today we visited: The National History Museum. The Capital Building. Pohick Bay
Today's weather: Thunder, Rain, Sunshine
Today I feel: Happy and embarrassed.
What I saw today: The National History Museum. The Capital Building. Pohick Bay.
My favorite part of the day: Finding shells along the river.
I liked: The Capital Building
I did not like: The freaking rain.
It was funny when: I kept farting during our tour of the Capital Building. They smelled horrible. (That's the understatement of the century!!)
Well, now that I've spilled the beans (see what I did there) on what has to be my most embarrassing moment in my entire life, I shall end this blog post here.
As for 2020??
Same old same old. House construction, trampoline jumping, etc.
Tomorrow, we make our last site seeing stop as we made our way out of D.C., heading for home!!