I had planned to make this tribute to my grandfather and had
wanted to wait until his birthday at the end of the month. However, today marks the one year anniversary
of his passing. And so I felt that today
would be the better day to make this tribute to my grandfather. I didn't grow up calling him “grandpa”. I grew up calling him “Deem”. And in my opinion, every girl should have a “Deem”. He was the best grandpa a girl could ask
for. It was such a bitter sweet day when
he died. His health had been going
downhill for many years and he suffered from Dementia. Dementia is such a cruel disease stealing
from its victims their memories and their minds. Deem had such a memory and was one of the
smartest people I know. He had so many
songs memorized that he would sing to us all of the time. And his “Little Redheaded Feller” stories
were the best. Deem could spin a tale
that would have you begging for more.
So, it was so very bitter to watch him waste away from the
Dementia. My uncle said it quite well
when he said that he felt that for Deem being trapped in the Dementia must have
been like a prison for him. He could see
Deem almost like he was holding onto the bars of his cell wanting to be
free. I had felt for a long time that my
Deem, my hero, had been gone for years.
Even still, it was so bitter and hard for me to let go and say
goodbye. But then it was also very
sweet. So sweet because I know that Deem
is no longer trapped and is free. I know
that he has returned home to our Heavenly Father and he is free from the
Dementia and physical ailments. I know
that he is the Deem he used to be. And
even though I miss him, it is so sweet to know I will see him again. So sweet to know that he’s looking down on me
and helping when I need it, and sweet to know that he’s there on the other side
rooting for me to make it back home. And so sweet to know that he’s already got a
chair set up in Heaven with my name on it.
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| Deem and Bammer and all the grandkids |
Since his passing one year ago, I have had several wonderful
experiences with him. I believe in life
after death. I believe that death is
just another door way into the next part of our journey. I believe that our loved ones on the other
side are there for us and that they do come and help us in times of need or
sorrow. I've had a couple of wonderful
dreams where Deem was there. I know that
Deem was at the temple on the day that Nathan and I were sealed. And just recently, Space Man Spiff was having
some difficulty with bad dreams. On one
particularly hard evening, I knew that Deem was there to comfort Space Man
Spiff. We sat and talked about Deem and
then Space Man Spiff became teary eyed because he could then feel Deem with
us. It is such a comfort to know that families
can be together forever and that it is a part of Heavenly Father’s plan. There will come a day when I will see my
grandpa again and I am and always will be a part of his eternal family.
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| Me being a vulture |
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| Going on a wheelbarrow ride around the circle |
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| The raising of the flag. Part of the Fourth of July tradition. |
I have so many memories of Deem that bring such joy to
recall to my memory. Deem was always
gentle and kind. I don’t think I ever
heard a harsh word come out of his mouth.
He loved children and there were many children everywhere who “adopted”
him as their grandpa too. My
grandparents went on a mission to the Philippines, the children there fell in
love with him and crowds of children would follow him where ever he went. He was the pied piper of the children. I can remember sitting on his lap while he
was eating his ice cream and begging for bites.
He always called me his little “vulture” but would give me bites
anyway. And boy did Deem have a sweet
tooth, especially for his homemade ice cream.
Nobody could make ice cream the way Deem could. Deem was never too busy to stop and play with
us or get us involved in helping him do what he was working on. My grandparents lived way up in the tops of
the Rocky Mountains in Colorado. The one
whole side of the mountain we had named “Scarface”. I spent many summers hiking Scarface with
Deem. I explored every inch of their
yard. Deem made toys for us to play on
and a little hut for the girls. (The
boys had built their own three story hut under the direction of my older
brother). Deem would load us all up in
his wheel barrow and take us for walks around the circle. The Fourth of July was always a treat with
the BBQ outside in the rocks, the watermelon seed spitting contests, the
raising of the flag and the reading of the Constitution. But my favorite part was the parade we put
on. Deem in the front as our fearless
leader with the flag, the rest of us trailing behind with a hodge podge of children’s
musical instruments. Oh we played loud
and we played off tune, but we marched around the circle with our heads held
high to celebrate our Independence Day. Deem
always made me feel like I was the most beautiful and special person
alive. He always made me feel like I was
the most important person. I knew that
Deem loved me and I knew he saw what Heavenly Father see’s in me. I think the thing I love most about Deem is
how special, important, and loved I am.
When I turned 16 Deem took me out on my first date. We went out to dinner and a movie and I will
never forget that special time I was able to have with him. I think in this world that there would be
many girls who would be embarrassed by having their grandpa taking them out on
their first date, but I wouldn't go back and change it for the world. My first date was with my grandpa and it is a
memory that I hold very dear and special to me.
Because in his eyes I am a princess of the Most High God and he treated
me as such. He treated every woman that
way. He loved my grandma with all of his
heart and talked about her with such love and reverence and had an undying
devotion to her.
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| One of the last pictures of Deem and Bammer before he got sick. |
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| Deem and Bammer wedding |
I had always felt so bad that my kids would never know the
Deem I knew. But by keeping his “Little
Redheaded Feller” stories alive, I feel like I can give them a taste of what it
was like. We talk about Deem all of the
time and I find myself reminiscing about my childhood and passing those stories
onto my kids. There will come a day when
they will have the chance to get to know the Deem I know.
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| Deem and Bammer on their mission to the Philippines |
I watch my kids with my dad now, and I see how he stops what
he is doing to play with them. I listen
to the stories he tells them that keeps them begging for more. I watch as he takes them on walks in the
wheel barrow. I watch as he spoils them as all grandpas should. I watch as he shares his Gatorade with them and gives them all marshmallows.
I watch as he gets them involved in the things he’s doing. I watch as my dad interacts with my kids in the
same ways Deem interacted with me. I see
how excited the kids get when we tell them that Grandpa Deem is coming. It makes my heart very happy to see the cycle
continue.
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| I love this picture of Grandpa Deem with Spider Monkey and Tiger Lily. Grandpa Deem is Spider Monkey's hero just like Deem was mine. |
Deem, I love you and I miss you. You are my hero and the best grandpa a girl
could ever wish for. Until we meet again
at Jesus Feet, may God be with you.
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| Baby Deem |
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| Deem in High School |
